“When you’re young your whole life is about the pursuit of fun. Then, you grow up and learn to be cautious. You could break a bone or a heart. You look before you leap and sometimes you don’t leap at all because there’s not always someone there to catch you. And in life, there’s no safety net. When did it stop being fun and start being scary?”

– Carrie Bradshaw, Sex and the City.

Isn’t that the exact question we all stop to ask ourselves at some point in our lives? It seems there is this certain moment where we just wake up and realise we are living our lives in fear of what is about to happen or what decision we are about to make.

I can’t remember the exact time I realised I was constantly over thinking everything and consequently letting opportunities slip through my fingers. Of course, we shouldn’t simply throw caution to the wind and disregard the consequences of our decisions, but we should take time out to think about the days when life was fun and simple.

Just take a moment to remember those carefree days and ask yourself why you can’t have that same feeling now. Yes, you may have more responsibilities and be less naive but you can still have a balance.

So, instead of being scared of what is yet to happen embrace everything and sometimes, don’t be scared to leap and have fun. 

By Markeeta Waddington.

Image by Silly Girl 

"I learned fairly early on that a beautiful woman doesn't consider herself beautiful at all. She's often crippled by lack of confidence. Every woman has something they dislike about themselves: if they're blonde, they want to be dark, if they're tall, they want to be short. If they have big breasts, they want to be flat-chested. The list is endless."

- Ed Burns 1998

I reckon this is ever more true in high school and university than in any other time of one's life. However, when the foundations are set for self-criticism, they tend to follow on onto adulthood and sadly, if not dealt with or reflected upon, can lead to a cycle, where such attitudes are passed on to younger girls.

Even knowing what magazines sell on their front covers are often nothing more than an illusion, one can find oneself sucked into the portal of body dissatisfaction and hatred. The environment around us is, unfortunately, not the healthiest for a woman's well being, although thankfully, we are starting to see some minute changes.

As individuals, it is important to be aware of the messages we take on from our external environment and monitor how they impact on the way we view our bodies. Talk about it with friends & sisters, reflect on unrealistic messages without being critical of other women, and let's slowly start to change the attitudes of body hate in society by starting with ourselves & the ones we love. 

I come from a poor background and an environment that the only thing teenagers do is make babies

Young girls think a great deal about their appearance and men.

I said no. I said no to poverty, I said no to illiteracy, I said no to mindsets.

I looked around and poverty was covering me. I felt as though I was stuck, I heard people whom I expected to back me up saying ‘You will never make it!’

I heard the person that was meant to love me telling me that she hates me. Doors were shut, opportunities denied, I felt as though I was all alone on this planet.

It felt like going forward was impossible and thoughts of suicide flooded my mind. But my belief in myself helped me to realise that I had the choice and strength to say ‘no.’

I said ‘No I am not going to take this.’

I said ‘No I‘m not staying here.’

They couldn’t stop me from being where I want to be, they couldn’t decide my destiny, I refused to be defeated.

You too can say ‘no’ to people who think you are not worth it.

I urge you to disagree with people who think you are not capable; people who think you cannot make it; people who think you are a nobody; refuse degrading opinions from people...they don’t know what you are made of.

You need people who will respect and value who you truly are- not people who will try to shape you the way they think you should be.

No one can stop you from being who you are, the key to your destiny lies with you, and no one can stop you without your consent.

There is no limit at what a person can achieve…

Written By Christinah Chauke.

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